We’ve got a real roadside renegade on our hands. Authorities say an unidentified man—clearly a graduate from the University of Terrible Decisions—was busted for swiping official signs all the way from Orlando to Pensacola. We’re talking Florida Forest Service signs, not “Free Kittens” flyers.
And what was he doing with them? Selling them on Facebook Marketplace… for up to $1,900 a pop! Because nothing says “luxury home décor” like a stolen “DO NOT FEED THE BEARS” sign next to your salt lamp.
Florida Agriculture Commissioner Wilton Simpson confirmed the arrest on X (formerly Twitter, now just a confused bird app). And to make this story even more Florida-tastic? Smokey Bear himself showed up for the takedown! That’s right—Smokey ditched his shovel and put on his badge. The only thing missing was Dog the Bounty Hunter riding in on an airboat.
No word yet on how many signs were recovered… or how many Facebook users willingly paid $1,900 for a sign that probably said "Controlled Burn In Progress."
Stay dumb, Florida. We’ll be here for it. 🐻💸